Just have no force to write my 2016 down…
Crappy year, doubled up with a diagnosed severe depression (that is slooowwwllyyyyy receding); combined with a separation that was “the straw that broke the camel”…it was too much. Too many “bottled up” emotions, and lots of accumulated events in the past years made it too much for me to handle.
I cracked. I broke up last spring.
Slowly, but surely, I rebuilt myself with some really trusted close friends and my medical team. Patience, introspection, confronting my fears and patterns accumulated through the years: those were the actions that defined my last summer and fall. To survive, and then start living a little again, I had to do a HUUUGGEEEEE clean-up in my head and my life. Which I started, and am still doing. HUGE, I tell you! People just have no idea how huge…
So, I can say that for the last month, it’s been…better. Oh, not “super-happy-dancing-on-rainbow-and-unicorns” better, but…you get the gist of it. I know I will get better with time, healing, and getting rid of fucking “assholy” people that were poisoning my life for too long. Also, managed to clear up some “life objectives”, and confirmed some life choices I already made in the past (but didn’t totally/publicly assumed, in a way of speaking), and I can now say this: my 2017 will start on a tiny-itsy-bitsy more optimistic way than last year. I should be OK, I am well surrounded, and I now know where I am going.
Bring it on, 2017. I have my fighting gloves on, ready to knock you out 😉