The Trump election; the Migrants situation in Europe and the Middle East; Black Lives Matter…
Last year was quite active in the rise of a very scary xenophobic public speech, maintained by uninhibited people who are now grabbing many powerful seats in our public institutions and governments all around the world. And I must admit, it scares me. As someone who studied history for many years, I can only see patterns that could cause the same mess humanity was at the beginning of the 20th century. Some of my close friends are telling me I am an alarmist, but still… I worry a lot when empathy, social values and community disappear in the public sphere, to make way to more individualistic purposes, shrouded by racism, sexism and savage capitalism. Yes, put me in the Carebear and “Socialist” camp, but I was raised to believe and want to live in a multicultural social-democratic country. I hate all the hate we now find more and more in the medias and public.
“A modern nation state cannot be built on an ontological notion of who belongs and who does not, whether it’s outright ethnic or pseudo-cultural. It needs to build on the notion of the nation as a community — a community including those who were born here, those who came to stay and those who will stay for a while and then return to their homes. The rights and duties of the members of this community should be defined by their achievements, and by the rule of law — not by whether they eat schnitzel or wear a head scarf.”
For the last couple of years (and probably because it’s part of what most of the mid-thirties people surrounding me are going through crisis), I had a lot of time – and occasions! – to reflect upon Love and relationships in our modern time. Mostly around the questions of why is it a sin to admit to our failures in our relations, why people shun us when we separate (or have a rough period), and why we should automatically hurt and become tragicomic drama queens ( to our friends and entourage) when we go through a separation or divorce (and for once, I prefer the Gwyneth Paltrow’s way, conscious uncoupling :P ).
Anyway, thought I could share with you one of the articles that generated tons of introspection, personal writing and discussions.
In “On Web Development” and in other contexts I’ve alluded to wrapping up, ending my old career. That’s only correct to an extent. (In keeping with the intelligence community, always put everyone at risk by adding backdoors.)
from Blog (Philosophy, Adventure, Arts, Web Development) · Jens Oliver Meiert http://bit.ly/1M521Qp
If there is ONE subject that touches me a lot in my professional domain, it’s the infamous Imposter Syndrome. Even after 17+ years working as a web professional, I still have that impression of feeling inadequate, that I will be debunked, my credibility “attacked” for not knowing everything…and it’s STUPID! It’s a fucking useless and stupid feeling, an anxious thought that just doesn’t want to leave you alone. No amount of work you do through the years can totally erased all these dark thoughts and feelings you feel most of your time, and in my case, having been the victim of bullying throughout most of high school did NOT help at all with my self-esteem and self-confidence (fuck you all, by the way, you worthless bullies from High School! You are soooooooooooooooooo not worthed all the post-years of trauma, psychological stress and therapy sessions you brought on your victims with all your vile words and physical attacks).
So go read this article from Christian Heilmann: as you will read, even long-time professionals can feel that syndrome. We are not alone!
Good responsive web design, by its nature, goes unnoticed to those consuming content online. So when someone asks for a new website, they’re often completely unaware of the concept, despite experiencing it on a daily basis. And yet, responsive website design is now acknowledged as standard practice throughout the industry. Building responsive websites has altered […]
from Webdesigner Depot http://bit.ly/1IYYORy
Can we talk some more about how guilt tripping someone for not being interested in you is a really shitty thing to do?
Look, I’m sorry you’re lonely or depressed or whatever. Those are bad things and having to deal with them isn’t fun. But I am not responsible. It is not my job to sacrifice my autonomy to make you feel better. Your attraction to me does not make your well-being my responsibility.
And to use your unhappiness as a tool to coerce me into a relationship or a sexual situation that I’m not comfortable with makes you a bad person.
Anybody who’s had to put up with this kind of emotional manipulation – you deserved better. You always deserve better. And you aren’t wrong to say no.